Sunday, July 24, 2016

still waiting

I'm glad Obama and Bush et al. attended the memorial service in Dallas for those murdered officers.

I wish they had and would do the same for all of these murdered unarmed citizens. It should not be seen as an indictment of all police to be horrified by police shootings.

I expect the police to be horrified, too.
(I mean, talk about the coworker from hell)

And, better still, to show it instead of phasing right into straw man defensive mode.

I think we need to treat and pay our police better, too, including having our taxes go toward covering their uniforms and equipment. When I was doing a lot of freelance reporting, I tried to advocate for better policies toward officers and wanted to interview some officers, even after they grilled me regarding my intentions, showing they know very little about journalism in the process, which would have been fine; I don't expect them to be experts in anyone's field but their own, as with anyone else (I grant cops no magical powers or hero status, though I appreciate good cops a lot--so, yes, as with anyone else: they are part of the community, no matter how much some departments or bad actors may choose to stand apart from the community).

What didn't feel fine was the condescension or their paranoia, which was way out of bounds, given that a) I'm unarmed b) They have the public's trust and c) I'll most likely be branded a liar no matter what I do and d) Something about how they could easily frame most citizens, and otherwise abuse them: hey, now there's tape. I said my piece and gave a little reassurance, but there's only so much time and energy a writer who is not only not having uniform or equipment covered, but also not being paid (read: on spec), can offer to men with fake names, who then take to insulting her using her real full name on the Internet. Of course the thread no longer exists.

But in print, they decided I had a liberal or somehow negative agenda, a preconceived conclusion they had set out to prove to themselves & did. So, that sucked, i.e., being called mean names and menaced online by grown, armed men who, facts being facts, my tax dollars support, and I don't really want to work in that area anymore as a writer or a woman; too much risk. And yes, it brought to light some truths for me that I just can't discard, nope.

And through all this, through these years that can grind, still waiting for the focus on male violence that we need in this country


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